PSA: Look a Gift Horse in the Mouth AKA "Helpers, Stop Helping!"

 

For background information, you can check out my original blog posts on my old site

HERE: https://lifecoachingwithryan.com/2017/07/31/psa-look-a-gift-horse-in-the-mouth-update/

and HERE: https://lifecoachingwithryan.com/2017/06/04/psa-look-a-gift-horse-in-the-mouth/

If you are a service provider and a scammer reaches out to you about coaching or counseling for four women and wants to know what you would charge, be wary. I was contacted nearly two years ago by someone referring to themselves as Steve Kolish; but the new name to be aware of is Rick Keefer using the email address [email protected] instead of one of the "Steve Kolish" iterations.

With that out of the way, here's a takeaway for all helpful people:

It's OK to say, "No." 

It's OK to say to yourself, "This doesn't feel right. I think I'm going to take a step back."

It's OK to think, "I don't think this person is being honest," or "This is too good to be true."

It's OK to be aware that having a bleeding...

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Goal Censoring!

 

LET'S TALK ABOUT GOAL-CENSORING

Beyond goal-setting, or perhaps before even setting or planning, everyone runs the risk of shutting down their goals. This might come in the form of preventing yourself from thinking "too much" about a dream or desire, or stopping yourself from talking about it. You might actually form the goal, but then refuse to plan a way to accomplish it because it's just too scary or overwhelming. Maybe you're afraid you'll be judged for having the goal. Maybe you've been told that dreams, goals, or desires like it aren't appropriate because of your gender, skin color, culture, or what-have-you.

Dreams and desires tend to be expressions of who we are, which means that goal-censorship is muting who we want to be, better versions of ourselves that don't get to come to life because we snuff out their source of energy -- our attention. To be the best You you can be, you need to pay attention to your goals, your dreams, your desires. Pay particular attention to the ones...

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My Story (part of it, anyway)

Uncategorized Apr 19, 2019

A Calling to Help

At 3 or 4 years of age, when asked what I wanted to be when I grew up, I adorably said, "I want to be a doctor, a teacher, and a veterinarian." I've always wanted to help people learn and heal, and so often these go hand-in-hand. 

When I was 9, my answer slightly changed: "I want to be a business man and a psychologist." I guess I was walking my vision in.

At 22, I went from working in Information Technology (IT) to searching for a job when the Dot Com bubble burst. I found that job in a retail store selling cellular phones. Well, I didn't do as much selling as customer service. Shocking.

After a rocky year, an abrupt turnaround, and a management promotion, I left for -- wait for it -- massage therapy. "That's more like it!" I moved to a new town and started working in a day spa. Unfortunately, being a massage therapist is hard on your body, and without spoiling a twist coming up in my story, let's just say I wasn't very good at dealing with spa politics.

So I...

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